Kheldar the Child of Light?
by Rose G
Summary: What would have happened if Garion chose Silk to be the Child of Light? Very silly stuff, I warn you. Please r/r


Kheldar the Child of Light?

Rose G

Disclaimer - All belongs to David and Leigh Eddings. Satisfied? 

A/N - This was written in preference to doing French homework, while I was in a really weird mood due to excess caffeine, then edited while under the influence of a cold. Don't blame me if it's crazy. It's set shortly after Seeress of Kell and takes place in an AU where Garion chooses Silk to be the Child of Light rather than Eriond.

Silk, Child of Light, God of the Angaraks and soon to be God of the World, smiled evilly at Aldur and rested his head on his steepled hand. 'Well, brother?'

'No, Silk. Your name is not going to be inscribed on the walls of every temple in the world, nor is your favourite joke about a Tolnedran merchant and the poison he buys from Nyssia and gives to the Kings daughter going to written in the stars. Nedra would disapprove.'

'I could bribe him.'

UL exploded. 'Silk, you DO NOT bribe Gods under any circumstances. Gods are incorruptible. Our duty is to run the world - you do not get paid for doing it.'

'What boring lives you must all lead brothers. Velvet could teach you a thing or two about having a good time and you should all try accepting bribes. Its so much fun to play one person off against another for no real reason - the greatest game in the world.' He grinned.

Nedra agreed but glared at Silk. 'How may times have you ripped off my children, Kheldar? I will not permit you to be part of our brotherhood until you have paid back all the money you owe, apologise to everyone that you ever ripped off or stitched up and shaved your scraggly beard - it makes you look too much like a Alorn.' 

'I AM AN ALORN! And I never done anything to anyone. You know I wouldn't lie, don't you?'

Issa spoke up in his strange, lisping voice. 'Brothers, this man you have all accepted as God of the Angaraks is well known for his hatred of my beloved serpents. Has he changed his mind about them since the gift I gave to his wife?'

'A snake, Issa? My wedding day and you give Velvet an immortal, ten foot long killer snake that speaks to her. How could you? I hate the things and as soon to be God of the World, I shall have my loyal subjects exterminate them. No longer shall the Nyissans worship snakes. Instead, they shall all worship - money!' 

'My people already do Kheldar. Long before any ambitious, hot headed Drasnians appeared to mar our fair earth, _my _people were making money and they do so still, far surpassing the incompetent attempts of their Drasnian cousins.'

Belar grabbed Silk's arms firmly as he lunged at Nedra. 'Brothers, I would say that this man is by far the most intelligent member of our group. Alone of you, he has a taste for ale, a sense of humour, and I know that he would never, ever dream of cheating anyone about anything. He is my brother, I accept that.' 

Silk turned to look up - a long way up - at the blonde haired God pinning him down and nodded meekly. 'In that case, Belar, do you think you could show me a few things? This lot keep saying that I cannot be trusted with too much power and won't show me anything.'

'What would you like to know, Kheldar?' Belar allowed Silk to sit down and offered him a pint of ale out of nowhere. Silk drained it in one go, and Belar smiled. 'Pretty good Silk. Another?' 

'Father, stop them! When Belar gets drinking, the other person normally dies!' Nedra screamed hysterically then buried his head in his hands as Silk, Belar and Chaldan began a drinking competition. UL shook his head and Nedra stared to take bets on the odds of Silk surviving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Three Hours Later ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The other Gods stared down at the chaos on the floor of the cave. Chaldan had passed out with the effort of keeping up with Belar, Issa had sent serpents out to collect the empty glasses that littered the place and Silk was nearly unconscious. Belar was drinking his 'victory pint' but looking rather concerned at Silk's lack of movement. 

'I -I don't really think I want to be God of the World anymore.' The Drasnian thief whimpered and raised a hand to his head, only to find that the movement sent stars through his vision. He took the normally Alorn course of action and swore as there was no-one nearby that he could kill. 'Belar! I feel ill. I thought that Gods didn't get ill.'

'They do, Silk, and they don't normally heal very well because we aren't meant to need to. Sorry, but your going to feel like that for an awfully long time.' Issa smiled and Silk stumbled out the cave with a hand over his mouth. 

'Why me? Why? Curse you, Belgarion. Why me?'


End file.
